@ 19/08/2011 – 15:44:52
@ 13/08/2011 – 10:55:47
Was amazed to see some people in the riots looting a Primark.
Should have gone to specsavers.
@ 30/07/2011 – 20:13:47
America is the change their National Anthem to the Aloe Blacc song " I need a Dollar"
@ 21/07/2011 – 20:29:49
@ 21/07/2011 – 15:28:33
@ 21/07/2011 – 13:59:40
@ 19/07/2011 – 19:23:23
@ 18/07/2011 – 13:31:24
1. A rat can last longer without water than a camel.
2. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks or it will digest itself.
3. The dot over the letter "i" is called a tittle.
4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
5. A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find a mate.
6. A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.
7. During the chariot scene in "Ben Hur," a small red car can be seen in the distance (and Heston's wearing a watch).
8. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents daily! (That explains a few mysteries....)
9. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
10. Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War II were made of wood. 11. The number of possible ways of playing the first four moves per side in a game of chess is 318,979,564,000
12. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with orange, purple and silver.
13. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan. There was never a recorded Wendy before.
14. The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin in World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo
15. If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death. (Who was the sadist who discovered this??)
16. Bruce Lee was so fast that they actually had to s-l-o-w film down so you could see his moves. That's the opposite of the norm...
17. The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."
18. The original name for butterfly was flutterby.
19. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
20. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles.
21. At that time, the most known player on the market was Victrola, so the called themselves Motorola
22. Roses may be red, but violets are indeed violet
23. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand.
24. Celery has negative calories. It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with.
25. Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.
26. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
27. Sherlock Holmes NEVER said, "Elementary, my dear Watson."
28. An old law in Bellingham, Washington, made it illegal for a woman to take more than three steps backwards while dancing!
29. The glue on Israeli postage is certified kosher.
30. The Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from public libraries.
31. Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a spacesuit damages them.
32. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave!
@ 10/07/2011 – 20:48:18
Great for people with no sense of smell like me!
EGGS: When something starts pecking its way out of the shell, the egg is probably past its prime.
DAIRY PRODUCTS: Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yoghurt. Yoghurt is spoiled when it starts to look like cottage cheese. Cottage cheese is spoiled when it starts to look like regular cheese. Regular cheese is nothing but spoiled milk anyway.
MAYONNAISE: If it makes you violently ill after you eat it, its probably off.
MEAT: If opening the fridge door causes stray animals from a three mile radius to congregate outside your house, the meat is spoiled.
LETTUCE: Lettuce is spoiled when you can’t get it off the bottom of the plate without using JIF (or CIF as its now known!)
CANNED GOODS: Any canned goods that have become the size or shape of a basketball should be disposed of … carefully.
CARROTS: A carrot that you can tie into a knot like a shoelace is not fresh.
WINE: Should not taste like salad dressing.
NACHO DIP: If you can take it out of its container and bounce it on the floor, its gone bad.
GENERAL RULE OF THUMB: Most food cannot be kept for longer than the average human lifespan.